Can Worry Over Losing My Job Make It Happen?? | Print |  E-mail
Sunday, 22 February 2009
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Question: 

Dear Belleruth,
I'm feeling anxious about the economy, worrying about losing my job, my health insurance, etc. etc.  I don't want to dwell on this, as I believe that my thoughts could manifest the very events I'm worrying about.
Any tools, affirmations, guided imagery to help with this?

Thanks,
Kathy

Answer:
Dear Kathy,
I’m so glad you asked this in the way that you did.  It gives me a chance to hopefully offer some reassurance and at the same time, rant and carry on about one of my favorite pet peeves. 

First off, let me say that I’m sorry you’re faced with these very real concerns. These are dicey times and no way am I minimizing this aspect of your question. A lot of really good, capable people are in this worrisome situation with you.

All we can do is try to control what we can – mobilizing this worry into beefing up job performance, trying to make yourself as indispensible to the boss as possible, keeping work relationships in good working order and building in as many alternative, just-in-case options as you can.  After doing everything possible (with your actions and your general demeanor) to create the best possible outcome, it’s up to the gods and the fates, and it’s best to just let it go. This is easier to do when you know you’ve done all you could. 

But as for this notion that if you worry, you’ll create the events you’re worrying about – well, that’s just not right… nor fair to yourself.  It’s hard enough to have the worries. To then be worried about your worries… well, that’s more worry than anyone needs.

That’s like so many people fearing that if they worry about getting cancer, they’ll get it - a level of child-like thinking, to assume we’re so powerful, that our momentary thoughts could transmute into concrete events in real time.  Maybe years and years, layers and layers of thoughts and resulting actions could – but a transient phase of worry?  I don’t think so.

So now we get to my pet peeve: what you’re describing is the negative mirror of the simplistic, insulting, new age notion being touted on TV and everywhere else lately, that we can wish/positive-think ourselves into love, money, success and happiness.  This is spiritual materialism!!  Do not be seduced by such drivel !!  It’s the road to magical thinking – the kind 2 year olds do (only for them, it’s developmentally appropriate). 

For instance, take the notion: “if I meditate and think good thoughts, I’ll be thin!”.  Rilly?? How about instead:  if I meditate, I’ll be more centered and clear,  more connected to my inner self and the Universe as a whole.  This may shift my biochemistry in such a way that I could be less compulsive with my eating.  It may give me more energy, which I might want to channel into walking every day. This in turn might increase my muscle mass, which would beef up my metabolism… you see where I’m going with this…. If you want to be thin, positivity alone is unlikely to do it. There need to be resultant behaviors.

We are complex beings living complex lives.  A lot of things interact to create a reality.  That goes for worry, too.  Channel your worry into positive, functional behaviors, then let it go, if you can.  But please remember that a little worry never killed anybody.

In the meantime, our Affirmations, Self-Confidence imagery or the marvelous Mary Sise’s Thought Field Therapy exercises on DVD might be just the ticket to get you over the hump and redirect your mind from unnecessary, non-functional worry.

I hope this helps.  Go forth and good luck!  And thanks for the opportunity for me to let loose with my favorite rant.

All best,

Belleruth


 



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Comments (5)Add Comment
...
written by Beth Lahaie, February 24, 2009
Thank you for your common sense response to this valid question. I am an optimistic person and positive thinking serves me well. While I believe in the benefits of visualizing myself having obtained my goals and dreams, it's important to me to be present in the happenings of today -- for THAT is where living takes place. THAT is my life. As a writer, I can dream about the day my bookshelves are filled with my published books, but those novels are not going to appear just because I visualize them and wish them into being. I have to study the craft, practice, and most importantly, I have to put myself in the chair and write. I've also found it helpful to spend a little time everyday with some of the affirmations and guided imagery sessions available here. They help me to clear my mind and focus/balance my thoughts and actions as I start my day. Thanks for all you do.
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written by Rachel, February 24, 2009
Can I just say I love you, Belleruth? THANK YOU for saying this. I'm all about positive thoughts, and dreaming big, but... let's be real. Someone once told me that if I just *wanted* to be pregnant enough, it would happen. I don't think I can want it any more than I already do! But this thinking made me feel guilty when fear creeps in, and I get afraid of miscarrying again, etc., and I think, "Oh no, what if my worry and fear will keep it from happening?" Part of me knew this was silly... but not all of me.
Thank you for reassuring me, and for keeping it real! :)
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written by Jean , February 25, 2009
This answer from Belleruth is bothering me. Why? What about the Law of Attraction? I've been studying Louise Hay for years and she writes about what we think we become. I just got over the shingles. In her book it has to do with waiting for the other shoe to drop. This is exactly how I was feeling. Does the Law of Attraction work or is this simply "magical thinking"? You said: "So now we get to my pet peeve: what you’re describing is the negative mirror of the simplistic, insulting, new age notion being touted on TV and everywhere else lately, that we can wish/positive-think ourselves into love, money, success and happiness. This is spiritual materialism!! Do not be seduced by such drivel !! It’s the road to magical thinking – the kind 2 year olds do (only for them, it’s developmentally appropriate)." Do you not believe in the Law of Attraction? I've been using your CD's along with EFT and using the LOA. Now I'm really confused. Can you explain more? Thank you.
...
written by Joni Larlee, February 26, 2009
Dear Belle Ruth,I attended your class on guided imagery in Indianapolis last spring and loved it and I shall be thankful for attending that workshop for the rest of my life. You are a precious soul and I am greatful you came into my life. Now.... This is how I feel about positve thinking and that's because I have spent the last 34 years of my life internalizing all that I have learned intellectually from a metaphysical and a psychospiritual perspective.
I had a very abusive childhood and without going through the details I benefited greatly from my metaphysical training. Having been raised a strict catholic I was constantly feeling like a bad person. I found a God of Love instead of a punishing God and I learned I had the power to change my life If I changed my conciousness. That was the beginning of a new way of life for me. I did not ask for a new car or a new house but what I asked for was total clearing at every level of my Being.I got it in spades. They say" Be careful what you ask for." Little did I know that I was about to embark on a Spiritual journey like nothing I had ever read about. The reason I am sharing this is from my perspective , I beleive it depends on if you are interpreting life from a literal point of view as opposed to a symbolic point of view.
For me, positive thinking helped to neutralize my birrage of negative thoughts so that I could focus on my heart felt feelings. Then I could use my mind in conjunction with my heart to direct the creative flow of energy to make changes in my life. It took time and trust but slowly as I cleared the disruptive memory impressions that came up as a result of the affirmations, I didn't have to keep working at it so hard as time went on. Many miracles happened as a result of new way of thinking but at some point I got really sick and I started to feel I had done something wrong again. I didn't realize that being dual in nature, when we make a positive statement we automatically create it's opposite. In other words the negative stuff rears it's ugly little head to be acknowledged and released. I started to doubt all that I had learned and I felt betrayed and I got angry at the new age thinkers because I felt they were deluding themselves as was I for believing that this stuff worked even though my life had begun to change for the better; although at the time I didn't think so... you see I almost died because I felt I could just treat(spiritual mind treatment) my problem away.I had a abscess behind an ovary for a long time and the doctor told me it was no big deal, I just had the flu,and so I ended up with peritonitis and pneumonia and I had to have a complete hysterectomy at age 37 in 1977. As bad as that 5 month experience was, it changed my life forever and what appeared to be such a bad thing was truely a blessing and food for my Soul. When you see life from a place of your human self only, you will always want for something and feel limited, because that's human nature and in that sense positive thinking helps to balance things out, but when you see life from a place of soul then you no longer need the dance of opposites, and from that place of knowingness you can watch yourself live life and create the reality that fulfills you. I feel that every soul has the right to explore and experience any religion or belief system they so choose and it is neither right or wrong at that level of awareness because perhaps the soul needs that particular energy for reasons beyond our limited understanding.
Anyway it took 3 months to clear the infection in my body before they could perform the surgery and in that time I did imagery and healing work on myself and when they went in the doctor said everything was clear but they removed everything anyway because they didn't want the infection to come back.I needed to believe I could heal myself and it worked but I was doing it from a totally different place in conciousness at that time because I had surrendered to the moment and I continued to believe I was already whole and the power of God within me knew exactly what to do and I let go. I felt it in my heart. In the understanding of that Oneness, I do not see perfect health as opposed to disease but I know that beyond the physical there is only perfect health and that is where I focus my attention, and if I feel I need the help of a doctor I go to one. That's honoring all aspects of my multidimensional self.
As far as the law of attraction goes, it's what you believe in your heart that creates the manifestation not the thought alone. In other words the feeling or underlying (unconcious belief)belief. Thats what self-awareness is all about, finding out what you really believe in your heart! Wow, this is really long ,but I hope my sharing will be a helpful point of view for you. Love, Joni
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written by Belleruth, March 02, 2009
Thanks for the comments and feedback! I'm going to address this issue in more detail in an upcoming update, because I see I've evoked some confusion and dismay in some quarters with my reply as it stands. Stay tuned. And thanks again.
BR

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