Woman Gets Slimed By Punk Psychic Reader | Print |  E-mail
Monday, 29 September 2008
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This question came not long ago:

Hi, I had a psychic reading that made me miserable. Won't go into details, but I am still hurt one month after the reading. Worst of all, the psychic has a popular reputation, and everyone seems to tell me how accurate he is.

In my situation though, I wanted to ask about my career because I was unemployed at that time. Yet, he chose to spoke about my love life and told me I had no luck in love in New Zealand.  But the worst thing was he recommended I return to my home country (I am Asian)...and what he did not know was I am much more unlucky in love there, because over there, people my age (29!) are considered over the hill and "old maids". However, he made plenty more assumptions about my culture that was not true, as well, and used them as basis for my going back.

Shortly after the reading (and many tears) I miraculously found a job that I liked. But it's too late. Since that reading, I've been so miserable. While my original worry about my career is lessening.... now, he's directed my fear to my pathetic romantic life, and confusion whether to stay or go. Because if what he says about my shitty love life is true, then why fullfil my hope of a successful career in New Zealand and end up a spinster? I have been more confused, upset, and not to mention offended by his reading.

He kept telling me I was stupid, and made lots of derogatory remarks about my astrological make-up. While I do appreciate honesty and bluntness in psychics, I really felt he overstepped the mark this time, not allowing me to ask my question, and then talking about something else I was not interested to know about. I mean, sure, I'd like to find love, but that was not my main purpose of seeing him. I suspect he was a little racist, or somewhat ignorant about my cultural background as well.

I felt inspired to send him a letter that i wrote telling him exactly how I felt. I do not need compensation, but I felt he needed to know....I have written the letter, to let out my emotions, but still feel no peace, until I have sent it. Do you think it's a good idea to send it to him, under an anonymous name?

Are there any guided imagery programs you recommend to clear this from my system, because it is making me VERY depressed, but the last thing I want to do is see another psychic. I wish I hadn't seen him, so that I could enjoy my job and be blissfully ignorant that the trade off for this is the lack of a love life. I don't believe my love life should only be limited to one country, but according to him, it really is.
Lila

Dear Lila,
Yikes!   You're giving way too much power to this jerk, to allow him to wreck your ideas and hopes about your own future.  C'mon, girl!!  Snap out of it!!  This guy is bogus - I don't care what you were told about his reputation!!

First of all, as any reputable psychic will tell you, no reader is right 100% of the time, and in fact, all they can read psychically is your probable future at that moment. You can step out of that chair and change your future to a parallel probability in the next minute.  So that's first of all. Nothing is written in stone

Second of all, any psychic who is this insulting, disempowering and abusive, not to mention racist, is no psychic (or person) worth your time or money.  The first rule of ESP etiquette is to say nothing that takes away options and choice, or that frightens or discourages a person.  So, typically, if a responsible psychic were to, let's say, see a probable future of someone having an automobile accident, he or she might give the information as a warning against being overly lead-footed on the accelerator, or about staying attentive and not getting distracted while driving – but never to say "You're going to get into an accident".  By framing the information in a responsible way, the psychic allows the client to change the probable direction that things are heading toward in a more choiceful and safe way. And the good ones all know how to do that.

Third of all, no psychic worth his chops would tell you what to do.  They aren’t supposed to do that – not their job.  Nor would they say that your romantic options are limited by geography. If your energy and circumstances and readiness for a relationship are getting activated, it will happen in Australia, Asia or Antarctica!

This guy is either a bullying sadist, or a jerk having a bad day, and taking it out on you - and charging you for it, to boot!…Or who knows?  Maybe he’s got some nefarious agenda to drive all the Asians out of New Zealand by giving bogus psychic readings!!  Whatever is motivating this punk, one thing’s for sure: he’s got no business giving readings.

My general suggestion to you would be to stop giving away your power to other people, letting random "experts" determine your mood, your future, your worth.  Enjoy your new job.  Stay in New Zealand if that’s where things are breaking for you.  Remember that love can find you anywhere, especially if you keep your heart open, and your mind sharp and clear for discriminating between the toads and the princes.

Send the letter if it will make you feel better. Sign it and own it, by all means.  Feel free to send my reply to you as well, if you want some ballast. Or don’t send it.  It doesn’t matter, because what he thinks doesn’t matter – it’s only worth doing if it helps you in some way.  Or take a ritual bath, whereby you cleanse yourself of the toxic gunk he left you with.  Or smudge him out of your field.  But no matter what you do, I hope you stop letting him limit your options. Stick with people who value you and help you stay true to your own opinions. 

Perhaps our Self-Confidence imagery would help. Also, David Illig's Self-Esteem CD is terrific imagery for this issue.

Good luck to you and thanks so much for the question, because it speaks to a lot of misunderstandings people have about psychic readings.  I wonder how many others have had similar experiences, or ponder these issues about what psychics can or cannot do, or wonder about the parallel probabilities for the future… 
All best,
Belleruth
 



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Comments (10)Add Comment
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written by Lynne, September 30, 2008
Thank you to you Lila, and to you Belleruth, for bringing forward a very important issue to do with the importance of integrity and sensitivity whether giving or receiving psychic readings. This has long been a pet peeve of mine, and I've seen painful situations arise because someone chose to believe another person's interpretation of their life situation. My prayer is that every human being learn to go within and listen. It is within that the real answers flow, if we become still and deeply listen. Sometimes we need outside counsel, or encouragement, or a different way to see things, but in the end our own discernment and inner wisdom as we connect with the Divine, is the most important information at all. Lila, I wish for you, the deep healing you seek, and inner knowing of your own beauty and strength. Belleruth, thank you for your wise reply and caring heart.

Love,
Lynne
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written by Chris Faulconer, September 30, 2008
Thanks Belleruth for your generous comments about psychics and for helping this women with her issues. All your conversation resonated for me. Chris
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written by Kathy, September 30, 2008
Belleruth, I loved your answer. Right on!
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written by Mary O'Shannon, September 30, 2008
Belleruth and Lila...

I totally agree with you, Belleruth! I am a counseling astrologer. My husband and I call our business "It's All Good Astrology" because we believe that every astrological birth chart and/or transit is a gift, designed for our highest good, whether it is inherently harmonious, or challenging. When I do a reading, my goal is to give my client the highest potentials of what I see before me, and encourage them to use the energies in a positive way! The realm of possible choices is infinite, and the client gets to choose!

Lila... no one... whether an astrologer, psychic, friend, or partner should have the power to tell you what to do. If you seek guidance from others, always sift it through your own filter... your inner voice. It's the only one that matters. And using the guided imagery to make sure the messages that come from inside are the ones that remind you of how wonderful, beautiful and magnificent you are is a wise choice. I know it has made a difference for me!

Blessings, love and light to both of you! Mary O'Shannon (Spiritsong)
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written by Karen P. Short, LICSW, September 30, 2008
I love what you wrote, Lynn, about using our own inner wisdom to discern what is truth to each of us. Becoming still and listening deeply to our own wisdom IS the most important of us. I truly believe that it is what connects us most directly to Universal Wisdom, the Divine, G-d Energy ~ whatever you wish to call it. I am an intuitive counselor, psychotherapist, and it is my goal with clients (and with myself!), to teach each of us to go within and feel our way to our truth. Others can guide us and hold the sacred space for us, but it is the individual who actually can "heal" him/herself. I like to think of it as coming into wholeness.

Best of luck to you, Lila, and thanks for all the comments from others.

Namaste,

Karen
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written by Barb, September 30, 2008
Read your Bible and you will find a love that lasts forever. You will also get self=confidence and self-esteem and much joy. Too many people are missing out on the love, joy, etc. that comes from our Savior....Blessings, Barb
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written by Pa, September 30, 2008
Good point that when a person lives a balanced life, taking care to take time to recharge our batteries, then our energy can be recharged up again. When we do that we think more clearly and when we are ready for love, it will happen where ever we are. We will be in the right place at the right time because we will make it the right place and time by our up beat energy.
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written by Natasha, September 30, 2008
I agree with the others that your answer was terrific. I hope the letter writer takes what you said to heart. That said,I was surprised that you gave a nod to the pseudoscience of psychics ("as any reputable psychic will tell you..." - ouch), especially given that your books seem to value scientific evidence.
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written by Jean Maurie, November 08, 2008
That was great what you said about the psychic being bogus. I work in this line and what I love to do is empower people and inspire them. It is too bad that someone like this gives the rest of the business a bad name.
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written by Mushim, January 12, 2010
Thank you, Belleruth, for publishing this helpful exchange online. Speaking as an Asian American, I am particularly grateful to you for validating the original writer's experience of having been subjected to racist, demeaning treatment at the hands of the so-called psychic. Making oneself vulnerable to someone who is supposed to be in a helping profession, then experiencing racism and diminishment is intensely painful and injurious. I hope that the person who reached out to you is empowered and invigorated by your reply, and is able to regain their confidence in their own inner wisdom and power.

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