Comments for How To Control My Overly Aggressive Social Behavior? at http://belleruthnaparstek.com , comment 1 to 3 out of 3 comments http://belleruthnaparstek.com Tue, 06 Jan 2009 19:02:05 +0100 FeedCreator 1.7.2 http://belleruthnaparstek.com/ask-belleruth/how-to-control-my-overly-aggressive-social-behavior.html#comment-41 I can empathize with this issue, and have found starting my days with prayer and meditation extremely helpful to keep calmer and more centered. I am in my fifties now, and find I am sometimes so good at active listening, that I often walk away from a social encounters feeling like I hardly shared my-self at all! I'm a lifelong #2/Helper type in the enneagram system, and now ask for God's guidance frequently to listen/acknowledge/but NOT try to "fix" others! Balence is certainly the key, but sometimes hard to find! CJ - CJ Mon, 08 Sep 2008 16:39:38 +0100 http://belleruthnaparstek.com/ask-belleruth/how-to-control-my-overly-aggressive-social-behavior.html#comment-38 Just an observation: From all the comments I've been reading, this seems to definitely be an anxiety-based issue, rather than a matter of social naivete or simple self-absorption. BR - Belleruth Fri, 05 Sep 2008 19:31:23 +0100 http://belleruthnaparstek.com/ask-belleruth/how-to-control-my-overly-aggressive-social-behavior.html#comment-31 I feel a kinship to this person if what she is saying is that she has a hard time restraining from prolonging conversations til people's eyes glaze over. I have gone through periods of my life where I was a silent member of a group- but not these last few years! I always seem to have something else to say- and idea to pass on- an experience to relate that seems relevant- etc, etc. And yes, I am older and my now deceased father once commented that he couldn't seem to help talking so much because it seemed that "every time 2 brain cells rubbed together my tongue starts flapping". He, like me, was an idea person- but I also know he had some problems with social skills. As a scientist he didn't seem able to engage in small talk- but if the conversation strayed to an area of his interest- watch out! You were in for a discourse. Becuase of this, I am highly aware of the impact of people who monopolize conversations- but at times- I seem unable to control my own tendancies. (and hey- this a pretty long winded reponse too, isn't it!). I have used the strategy of having my husband give me agreed upon cues- and that can work or backfire if I think he is needlessly "shushing" me. I also know that the more anxious I am, the more I will yammer on. Thanks for the ideas on mindfullness. I am practicing yoga- guess it's time for meditation. I have also very much appreciated your guided imagary tapes for anxiety- they have gotten me through some tough times. - anne Thu, 04 Sep 2008 00:34:28 +0100